As I reflected on last year, I asked myself, “what was the main lesson God taught me?” I thought of love. Love would sum up everything I have experienced last year. Love is an on-going lesson: love has no loopholes.
I grew up in a home where “I love you” was never uttered. I perceived my mom and grandaunt (my father died when I was young) loved me based on their actions, but they did not say it.
As I grew older, I dismissed anything with the word love. I could not understand the word love, I could not measure it, I could not touch it, and I could not grasp what it is.
What is love?
Almost every wedding I have attended, I heard the scripture 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7, sometimes read by me. It states:
Love endures with patience and serenity, love is kind and thoughtful, and is not jealous or envious, love does not brag and is not proud or arrogant. It is not rude; it is not self-seeking, it is not provoked [not overly sensitive and easily angered]; it is does not take into account a wrong endured. It does not rejoice at injustice, but rejoices with the truth [when right and truth prevail]. Love bears all things [regardless of what comes], believes all things [looking for the best in each one], hopes all things [remaining steadfast during difficult times], endures all things [without weakening].
But have we considered or meditated on what love is in this scripture?
Love is…
Love endures with patience and serenity. Patience is often confused with waiting, but the oxford online dictionary defines patience as the capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble, or suffering without getting angry or upset. And serenity is the state of being calm, peaceful, and untroubled. Often, we find ourselves around people with different personalities, and we require patience and serenity to love them. However, the world paints a picture of love as always smiling and perfection. But, we know patience is not a characteristic developed when everything is calm and peaceful (or perfect). Patience requires mental work. We develop love when we endure hardships with patience.
Love is kind and thoughtful: this means more than giving something to somebody. Kindness and thoughtfulness are considering what others need and fulfilling that need even when it is inconvenient. It involves giving of yourselves and what you have without looking to get anything in return. It is; giving encouragement, money, time, food, a smile, whatever the person requires.
Love is not…
Love is not jealous or envious: jealousy is not wanting someone to have what you have. Whereas envy is wanting what someone else has and even despising them for it. Love is being secured and contented in who you are, what you have, and your abilities.
Love does not brag, is not proud, or is arrogant: it does not boast about accomplishments and achievements. Love thinks of others above himself. Love serves others.
Love is not rude. It is polite and well-mannered. When you love someone, you consider the words you use with them. You do not criticize or judge them.
Love is not self-seeking: love is selfless.
Love is not provoked. Not only should you be nice when all is well, but you should also be nice even when others do not love you. You need a forgiving and compassionate heart, but have a thick-skinned (not being overly sensitive).
Love does not take into account a wrong endured. When you love others, you do not keep records of wrongs they did. It is tempting when others do wrong to us to get angry and with that, we bring up all incidences prior, this is not love. Love forgives.
Love does not rejoice at injustice. Any type of unjust act done to anyone, regardless of their race or social status, is not an act of love.
Love has no loopholes
Love bears all things, hopes all things, believes all things, and endures all things. Real love has no loopholes; no wonder the scripture says love covers a multitude of sins. Real love, loves despite or regardless. Love has no reason to love it just does. On the other hand, if you love someone because of a reason – the reason is the condition for your love. If that condition is unmet, you have no reason to love – this is the world’s view of love.
Love is not a what; love is a who!
When I meditate on this word, I ask myself if can we as human beings truly love? It seems impossible – love transcends the physical – It is impossible with man. It is from another realm – the spiritual and we cannot know love without knowing God.
God is Love
God is love (1 John 4:7). For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son that whosoever believed in him should not perish but have everlasting life. John 3:16. Imagine that! Would you give any of your children away to save the world? No. God loves us so much that he sent his son (also God) to sacrifice so we can live, that we can love. How selfless, kind, thoughtful, and out of this world. God loves you, and He loves me. Let that sink in. That is sacrifice, that is love.
Jesus is our model. He was love incarnate. If we could replace 1 Corinthians 4-7 in one word, it would be Jesus. Jesus was 100% man and 100% God. If we follow Him, we too can be love (noun).
It doesn’t matter who says it (I love you) or doesn’t, because God loves us. We can love with no excuses, loopholes, or conditions because God loves us.
Understand this
When I began to understand this, I had so much compassion for everyone I thought did not love me. I wanted to love them because God loved me. He loved me when I lacked understanding, when I did not deserve, when I was angry, and cold.
Today I am telling you God loves you, He never stopped loving you, He will never stop loving you. He is not looking for achievements or what you can do, He wants is to love you. And with that love, you can love Him and love His people. The scriptures say wisdom is the principal thing, therefore get wisdom and in all your getting, get an understanding (Proverbs 4:7): This is wisdom, allow God to love you, love God, and love others as yourself. Here is where life begins.
I LOVE YOU